Things went much better today!! They’ve been giving me benedryl prior to the chemo (to help in case you have an allergic reaction to the chemo) and I really hated it the past 2 weeks. Anyway I was able to take the benedryl by mouth instead of through IV today, so it wasn’t as intense. Much better experience. No restless legs. Tired but not too out of it and no nausea. Woooooo! ✅✅✅

Pre-chemo coffee date ☕️

Round 3 today!

Ellie learned how to give kisses and it’s the best medicine ever. (Or she’s trying to bite my face.. not 100% sure 🤷🏼‍♀️)

🥰🥰🥰

“When life gives you a hundred reasons to break down and cry, show life that you have a million reasons to smile and laugh.”

The past few days have been tough. It seems that 2 days after chemo is the day I have the most side effects. Then yesterday I was feeling a little better but still so tired. Physically this is difficult. But mentally it’s even harder. I’m trying to figure out a new normal. I can put in a load of laundry but then I have to sit down. I can run a quick errand but then I have to come home and take a nap.

It’s beyond frustrating I can’t do all the things I want to do. And I feel guilty that Ellie is in daycare while I’m home, but there is absolutely no way I could care for her by myself right now.

But today is a new day. Woke up feeling a little more positive. Got some good Saturday morning snuggles with this sweet boy.

And then Ellie started dancing with her little ducky. 🐥 🤣

Definitely have plenty of reasons to smile and laugh. 😍

Eric and I are overwhelmed with the amount of support we’ve gotten in the past few weeks!

Calls, texts, emails. Meals. Babysitting at the last minute. Encouraging comments on Facebook. Funny memes to keep us laughing. Donations on the gofundme. Rides into Boston. Little gifts sent in the mail to lift my spirits.

I never thought I’d have a gofundme set up for me. In fact when Josh and Sarah first mentioned it my first thought was that it wasn’t really necessary. Eric and I are not generally the type to ask for help. I’m learning that it’s REALLY hard not only to ask for help, but also to accept help. But given that I can’t work for the foreseeable future, and the kids are staying in preschool/daycare, the gofundme is going to be so incredibly helpful.

The words “thank you” don’t even seem to capture what I want to say. It’s truly amazing. Donations from so many people from so many stages of our lives. Friends, family, coworkers, people Eric and I went to school with, friends of friends, etc. Even people I’ve never even met are going out of their way to support us. We are blessed to have such wonderful people in our lives!

In this crazy world we live in, this honestly reaffirms my faith that there are really kind, caring, generous people out there!

Thanks everyone. 🤗

So far this whole chemo thing has been such a rollercoaster. Some days I feel pretty normal. Other days I’m in bed quite a bit. Last week I felt ok about the chemo treatment. Today I hated it. Sigh. Definitely was nauseous today, and had restless legs again, and we had an issue with the IV being painful so they had to take it out and put one in the other hand. Not fun.

But it’s over. Took a nap when I got home and then we celebrated Eric’s birthday tonight! Ellie wasn’t feeling the group pic. These pictures pretty accurately sum up my life right now 😆

But how cute is this?

So normally I’ll be doing treatments on Mondays, but this week it’ll be Tuesday. (Anybody else think it’s odd that Dana Farber isn’t open on MLK day? I mean, doesn’t it seem like the kind of place that should be open every day?) 🤷🏼‍♀️

Hoping it will go much faster than last time. Every 3 weeks it’s a longer infusion because I get chemo plus two immunotherapy drugs. So that’s partly why last week was so long. This week it’s only the chemo, and I have an early morning appointment, so hopefully it won’t be an all day thing this time! 🤞🏻

You know who doesn’t care about cancer?

4 year olds.

On the one hand, it’s refreshing. Ben treats me the same as he did before.

Sometimes that’s great. He’s keeping a level of normalcy in our lives that is really helpful.

Other times he’s throwing a tantrum because HE wanted to take off his sweatshirt HIMSELF but I took it off for him and why can’t I put his sweatshirt back on so HE can take it off this time????!!!!

Seriously? SERIOUSLY?

Oh and the worst part? I can’t drink because of chemo. Somebody have a glass of wine for me please. 🍷😉

I’m blown away by everyone’s support. The amount of people who have reached out through this blog and Facebook is incredible. I’m feeling the love! It really helps to know I’ve got so many friends and family cheering me on and supporting us in so many different ways!

And although this is going to embarrass Eric (sorry honey lol), I have to say I have the most amazing husband. He has been so wonderful. He’s doing so much with the kids everyday with dropoff and pickup for daycare, dinner, bedtime routines etc. I try to help as much as I can but he’s doing so much of it now (I trained him well hahaha). He took care of Ellie last night when she puked and I was freaking out lysoling the whole house 😬🤣 Most of all he reminds me every day that we are going to get through this. 😍😍

Woke up feeling a lot better today! Woooooo. I’ll take it.

Might even attempt to do a few things around the house. (I said might. Don’t quote me on that 😂)